Clownin' at Jumbo's

The other day my Facebook events page had a peculiar invite. The invite was as such: dress up in "whiteface," which I have learned is slang for clown makeup, and head to Jumbo's Clown Room in Hollywood for a booze fueled night of exotic dancing. Of the many strange and fun costumes I've worn, clown is not one of them. Gauntlet thrown, I painted my face white and went with a French/burlesque influenced clown.  I've lived in this town pretty much my entire life, minus the handful of college years in NYC, and had never NEVER been to Jumbo's. I had until this birthday outing only been to one strip club in Vegas, a surreal dark damp hole with lots of orange bodies in glow in the dark bikinis. While at this Vegas club I was hit on by a young girl clearly on massive doses of mood altering chemicals and gave a few dollars to the only girl with a natural set of ta-tas, but that is an entirely different story left for the memoirs I will never write.

Back to Night of the Jumbo's- we met in north Chinatown at the art studio complex where the birthday gent has his welding space. I was relieved to see other clowns gathered in the parking lot drinking from flasks. Up to that point I was worried that this was one of those painful 80's movie moments where I misunderstood the invitation and it was all a snarky joke in which I was the big fat butt. But no! Other strange wonderful folk also dove into the deep end awaiting whatever the night had to offer us. I'm so glad I found a group of friends as down to say "YES!"

We got to Jumbo's and found a table in the small room with short bar barely large enough for two bartenders. Despite the crowd they were great at keeping pace with drink orders which isn't hard when 98% of the drinks served are beer and a shot. If you need a cocktail with 37 steps and a garnish prettier than Kate Middleton's fascinators go to Harvard and Stone down the street. Maybe I was clueless, but it didn't seem like anyone cared that our motley crew was a carnival of clowning, after all Jumbo's is famous for being where Courtney Love was a dancer. And boy howdy were these dancers awesome! The heels alone are worth a visit. Lithe ladies in bikinis twisted and pirouetted their bodies all over the 5' stage and pole. The entire crowd cheered as the girls displayed acrobatic miracles to a playlist that varied from punk rock to Michael Jackson. Most of the gals were talented at the whole twisty pole dancing but the one that really outshone the others was covered in gorgeous black tattoos and had serious stage presence. I gave her ALL of my spending money, not so much making it rain, I certainly made it drizzle.